Day 16 - Kommune Registration

When I was in middle school, maybe grade school, there was this TV mini-series called "AmeriKa". The premise was essentially this; the Soviets won World War Three, or something similar, and as such became the rulers / overlords of the United States. This is what life would be like in America if the Russians had won. Sorry AmeriKa.

I don't remember much about it other than the title. I'm pretty sure we were all forced at AK-47-point to speak Russian. Everything was pretty gray and / or brown. I think there was lots of standing in line. Possibly for bread. Maybe potatoes.

All, or at least most of the hard C's in Denmark have been replaced with K's. The word "commune" seems much, much harder as "kommune". A commune is a happy place for sharing vegetables and unwashed patchouli stink. A KOMMUNE sounds far more nefarious. Who knows what could happen?! I was certain that I'd have to stand in line, possibly all day. I was certain there was no potato at the end of said line.


Diversions aside, the kommune is really just the area we live in and the associated government agency / building where we have to do any kind of local bureaucratic stuff. I DID have to stand in line, but everyone was friendly in his / her very Danish way. Everything was very organized. Our fixer / handler / mobility person Susan guided us through the process.

When you walk in there's an electronic podium with an electronic touch-pad. Here, there are a number of options to choose from. Pay parking. Get a drivers license. Change your address. Register.

Depending on which service is chosen, a ticket is printed with a letter and number. The letter describes the type of service chosen and the number is your spot in the queue. We sat and waited until our number popped up on a flat screen television and we were off to the "bord" - table in Danish - number displayed.

This all felt very futuristic.

I'm amazed that this kind of line waiting / bureaucracy center didn't have more yelling or more security or even glass between the kommune representative handling my paperwork and me.

The Danish consulate in NYC was very secure. Thick plexiglass between the employees and the applicants. Security guards. Multiple locked rooms. It was also very futuristic, but very high grade research facility futuristic.

The kommune office here felt more like the circulation desk at a library.

Emily and I were given our CPR numbers - similar to a social security number - and assigned a doctor. Our kommune, Fredriksberg, didn't have any information on the doctors other than name, so Emily picked her favorite of the three.

If I understand it correctly, the assigned doctor is sort of like a PCP. They are the first contact, and can then refer the patient to a specialist and so on and so on. There's even a number to call when something's wrong but the patient isn't sure if he / she needs to go to the doctor. The doctor on the end of the line will determine if it's even necessary to come in. Phone triage!

So that was it with the kommune. It even has its own shield / seal / coat of arms!

With registration complete and CPR numbers in hand, we made our way to Danske bank to open a bank account. They don't really do checks here - everything is done with a debit card / online and there were three different options for debit cards.

One that only works in Denmark and works at every shop / taxi / service in Denmark.
One that works everywhere but only 98% of the shops / taxis / services in Denmark.
One that works everywhere and works at all of the shops / taxis / services in Denmark.

The first two are free and the third cost something like 150 dkk a year - about $25. We opted for the third.

They are very strange about credit cards here. We won't be able to get one until we "build credit" which I guess means until they see that we're actually depositing money into our account on a regular basis. Sussane - our contact at Danske - told us that Danes typically use their credit cards for "things they don't have money for". Small adjustments. We'll see if we qualify in a few months.

Another weird thing is the time table. It may take up to fourteen days to completely open our account. We may be able to wire in money in three days. Oh well, we'll just have to roll with it.

Things do seem to move more slowly here in general - after all of our paperwork / etc we went shopping again. Checkout lines are long and slow.

We also needed to pick up our mass transit passes. 7-Eleven must have some deal with the Danish transit system as that's where the passes are purchased; at a 7-Eleven adjacent to the metro station. Emily bought a month pass that will allow her to travel to and from Maløv for work and I purchased a two-zone klippekort, which allows travel for a maximum of 20 klips.

Confused? Of course you are. Stay tuned, tomorrow I'll break down - if I can figure it out by then - the klips, klaps, and klops of the Danish metro system.